I read some other blogs, eh-hem Juli, Jess, Linds, Megh, Becky, Rini...and I can't help but be so impressed by the expression of thought. I really don't have time to sit down and think right now, let alone express my thought eloquently..did I even spell that word right?!
One lesson that I've been wrestling with God about it contentment. I've been trying to have faith that God will give me what I want (let's just be honest here) in addition, courage to keep living through some of my stresses without loss of hope. I'm not very good at persistence sometimes. I can't go into all my stresses, nor does anyone want to read all that, but I feel that this season of life is going to change. I don't know what that means.
ON a lighter note, I redid my bathroom and the 3 people that have seen it haven't said a word. So, my guess is that it's too drastic and bright. AS I was peeing one morning, I was looking at it and sort of wishing someone would come over and say, "Oh Lis...what an artist you are, you're so good with colors and decor" and then the more I thought, the more I really settled with the fact that I'm o.k. if I do some of these things without anyone noticing or complimenting. I'm getting better with just doing things how I think they should go..whether it be doing a jig during worship, painting my bathroom hot pink, disciplining my child instead of just being lazy or not attending a function or group and being one of the only ones who doesn't. Conviction, I'm starting to learn, isn't always passionate or deep. Learning what conviction sounds/feels like can come in the still, quiet moments. It also needs to come straight from God...sometimes (and here's an even bigger rabbit trail coming up) I've unfortunately had the wrong convictions. So, why am I posting this?
Because conviction can guide us and shape us and sometimes I know I'm not pulled in the right direction because my motives are off. So, I'm trying to learn this summer to know what I believe, practice what I believe, no matter if most around me are doing things different.
To end with today, I'm really excited that I got a used camera. Technology is too fast paced for me. But I hope that with photography classes under my belt and now with a professional camera, I can begin to unleash some creativeness. Not necessarily for pay, at times, but more for capturing an art that I love and experiencing God through that art. So, thanks Alan for forking over the monies for me and thank you God for giving me this opportunity.
You probably won't hear from me for a while. I've got school starting and that will be my focus. Much love. And I'm always on FB if you wanna talk.
